Socially Yours: To Be a Gentleman


Courtesy of Deborah King, “What Would Mrs. King Do?”

A true gentleman is respectful to everyone in his orbit, from women he’d like to date to elderly people who need help. He takes impeccable care of his appearance, is polite, and is kind to women regardless of whether or not he thinks he has a chance with them. To be a gentleman, one must be self-aware, mature and courteous. Although it seems that chivalry is dead, you can make a difference by making the effort to bring more respect and care into the world.

Being male does not guarantee a boy will grow up to be a gentleman and the current self-absorbed culture is not likely to model or promote the qualities of a gentleman. It is a process for a boy to become a man and develop into a gentleman.

A gentleman understands his appearance, behavior, and way of communicating provide others with valuable insight into his character. He demonstrates strength through his strong character and integrity. The traits of a gentleman include:

• A gentleman is generous with his time, wisdom and resources. He willingly serves others and extends a hand to those in need.
• A gentleman possesses a positive outlook on life. His humor and consistent encouragement attract others to him.
• A gentleman is a lifelong learner. He maintains a teachable posture and embraces change for the better.
• A gentleman model’s civility in how he treats others. He demonstrates respect, restraint, and personal responsibility in all his interactions. He is honorable, and values and respects others.
• A gentleman is well mannered and knows what is appropriate. He is able to navigate various social and professional settings with ease and proficiency. He embraces all people – those from other cultures, individuals from various social and economic backgrounds.
• A gentleman possesses a strong work ethic. He takes pride in his labor and strives to give his very best. He is trustworthy, loyal and people speak well of him.
• A gentleman is confident. His posture and body language communicate a strong personal presence.
• A gentleman is well dressed. He knows how to select clothing that is appropriate for any occasion and that will assist him in accomplishing his goals. He is well groomed and practices good hygiene. He understands that his personal appearance – the way he chooses to dress, groom, and carry himself – opens doors to new opportunities.
• A gentleman is well spoken and a generous listener. He knows how to effectively connect with others and communicate his message.
• A gentleman is known for his integrity. He is a man of his word and follows through with his commitments, whatever the cost. His actions reflect who he has chosen to be and are not based upon the opinions of others.

“Being male is a matter of birth, being a man is a matter of age, but being a gentleman is a matter of choice.” ~Unknown



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